I bet you anything it started off with statements that sounded like these:“But I thought that …”“I just assumed if…”“I didn’t know that…”If you’re nodding your head, you just discovered why most relationships fail. Never make the mistake of assuming what your partner thinks.
If you’re not sure, it’s really as simple as asking.
We don’t normally talk about these things with friends or family but if you are going to get serious with someone it is important that you can with your partner.
Talking openly about things helps to build trust and will help prevent conflict or misunderstandings from happening in the future. The best reason to get serious with someone is because you really want to build a life with them because of who they are and how they make you feel. Sometimes people get seriously involved in relationships not because of what is happening in the here and now but to try and heal, or escape, from the hurt of something that happened in the past.
When you focus on giving, you’ll always feel happy.
By making your partner’s life better, the relationship becomes a very positive experience for the both of you.
If the answer is ‘yes’ you can go on to talk about what ‘getting serious’ means for each of you. The chances are that if you met on e Harmony then you are, but it is always worth talking things through before you make a big commitment.
If you have very different political or spiritual aspirations they may not be affecting your relationship at the moment but they could potentially in the future.
If you can’t see yourself together in a year, or 5 years because you know your plans are different from theirs it is ok to have fun while it lasts but keep it light and make sure you both know where you stand. Take a quiet five minutes and allow yourself to really imagine being with this person for the rest of your life. Do you care about each other’s dreams and encourage and support one another?Authors Lee and Leslie Strobel say the following questions are important to consider before you being a dating relationship. Can he describe a specific time or era during which he received Christ's gift of eternal life?If he can't pinpoint the time of his conversion, or at least the time frame in which it occurred, then it might not have ever happened. Is he counting on his good deeds, religious rituals, and winning smile to get to heaven, or does he describe coming to the point of recognizing his sinfulness, turning from his own path in life, and receiving Christ as his forgiver and leader?By talking openly about what you need you will each have the chance to decide if you feel you can deliver before you go any further.Can you trust them with difficult or private matters?