But what really got my attention from her note, and the motivation for this post, is how she started her email: “I can understand your need to want to meet his children as I think it may signal a level of commitment to you and the relationship, that you are ‘known,’ and he is interested, etc.And while I can appreciate that, I would ask you to look at it from the children’s perspective.It seems for many of these women, meeting his kids is a really big deal. It’s a sign, a sign of interest, a sign of faithfulness, perhaps a sign of his love.And for single dads who are doing the job of fatherhood right, it should be a sign.Note how he assured her that the children and the mother know about her.
The mom may be overly territorial and that Momma Bear will see any female, and especially one who takes special interest in her kids, as a dangerous intruder that must be closely watched and, if necessary, stopped.
Your relationship is relatively new, long distance, and as you said, “a bit difficult.” To meet a partner’s child leaves an impact, on you, but most certainly on them.
Kids might play it off as ‘no big deal,’ but I can assure you it is.
I receive lots of emails from women, many without children, asking questions about dating single dads.
The common problem is meeting his children – specifically, why won’t he let her meet them, why he avoids, or goes hot and cold, about meeting them, and similar.